Why men date other marrieds?
Chat about a loaded subject that no one wants to chat about, this is it. Amusing thing, married dating have been going on since the beginning of the world. Extramarital affairs can be burdened with troubles, cause sadness, and other problems. Also you must wrap your brain around all the other issues, there’s that truth and honesty issue, money, age difference, faith upbringing, guilt, and on and on. I suppose there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the intention of this post I should identify an affair as a long term, maybe years long relationship of a sexual nature between two individuals of whom one or both are married to other persons, married man date.
Why do people have extramarital affairs? There are as many reasons as there are women seeking an affair. I think generally though it is just the human condition, the need for liking, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and appreciated. Here are a several explanations I have run across.
Biologically we as humans are all sexual creatures. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasing and fun, and sex makes us escape the world for a small period of time. This euphoria exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels elevated enough. Some people can turn the desire on and off, some are excellent at controlling it and others are so-so at best. But we all have it, young and mature, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the excitement of the hunt. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the caring for another human being, for some it is the desire to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the whole romance thing. These wishes and yearnings can be so strong they prevail over the taboos humanity has erected against extramarital affairs. For lots of people the yearnings will beat their doubts and make them risk the wrath of not only their relatives, but society also. So why, what is the mechanism?
Sex Addicts, probably some of us are. Sex is terribly pleasant, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of biologically motivated sex addicts and can find away to have sex and not injure your spouse or anyone else? You would need to minimize the jeopardy you are taking. If you have the approach that a good affair is one that is advantageous to all, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I think this is the major group, gigantic truly. There are many couples whose marital relationships is over, except they are comfortable in the manner they live, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your spouse but there is no romance. Then there are the children to look after. Your savings are so entangled. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to stay as a family besides love and sex.
Physical reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical circumstances that stop them completing the sex act, at least not with their spouse. An marital affair occasionally solves the trouble while keeping the marriage whole.
Neglect, sorrowfully this is a frequent cause I fear. One or the other, generally the gentleman is sexually neglecting his woman for a number of reasons. As a man I actually am thankful to you guys neglecting your wives and making them accessible to us guys of romance, making them “hot wives” Though I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Also there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not only neglectful, but malevolent.
Something is just omitted in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Probably its romance that is missing, could be it is a lack of love, maybe caring is disappeared, could be it is the intimacy, could be neglect. Maybe we have just grown distantly, our ordinary interests diverged. Maybe it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my ages, is opposed to of what you want. Could be I simply do not know what I want from the marriage anymore. Maybe, just maybe I miss that feeling that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The number one reason people give is, they search for the passion that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to run away, for economic gain, for vengeance and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.
Tags: affairs, Dating, dating married people, extramarital affairs, Marriage, married dating, seeking an affair